A bluffer's guide to... Paranormals

by Olivia Knight

With the beautiful new Black Lace covers came three new lines: paranormals, contemporaries, and historicals. Over the next three Wednesdays, we’ll be rounding up their pretty pictures and offering a bluffer’s guide to each line.

Top facts:
Black Lace line: paranormals
Colour: purple
Committed Lusties, past and present: Janine Ashbless, Portia Da Costa, Mathilde Madden, Olivia Knight, Kristina Lloyd, Madelynne Ellis

In a nutshell
‘Paranormal’ means fantasy, fairytale, magic, myth, mysterious beasties, and things that go bump! in the night. Some just bump! and some bumpitty-bumpitty-bump.

Behind the scenes
This is the line of books which made our editor decree “If they’re going to sleep with it, it has to have a human head!” Now you can imagine the story proposals that didn’t get the official stamp of approval. Rejected non-human-head lovers included dragons, trees, and minotaurs. Giant scorpions with human heads snuck in the back door.

The heroes
Even the most thigh-slappingly normal bloke will have his secret identity. He may appear to be an environmental activist, a university student, a tourist, a local musician, or an arctic explorer, but he’ll turn out to be a magician, a ghost, a member of an ancient race, a god, or a vampire. He probably faces a daily struggle not to accidentally kill you, but the chances are good your love was foredestined in a previous lifetime / by a prophecy / by an inescapable supernatural tie.

The heroines
Alpha-females to a woman: there’s no time for simpering flowers when you’re locked in a battle against forces what man was not meant to wot of. These chicks are tough: they’ll gut ex-lovers, eat snakes to survive, lead armies, face down the devil, catch werewolves, exorcise demons, endure bitter physical hardship, and wield insane amounts of power. They’re queens, time-travellers, priestesses, sorceresses, reincarnated witches, and goddesses, although at first glance they may seem to be a landscape gardener, a barmaid, or a student. Won't say: "No, don't... we shouldn't..." Will say: "CHARGE!"

The best bit about writing paranormals
• You can let your imagination out its cage and have an iron-clad reason for keeping your hero in a cage
• Sleeping is reclassified as research: after all, you have to know what it’s like to fly
• All your delusions of grandeur find their home

The best bit about reading paranormals
• Destiny! Contemporary couples just have this feeling they’re meant for each other – in paranormals, the elves said so. Or the stars, or an ancient scroll, or a forgotten prophecy, but you get the picture.
• Mystery! Magic and mystery are hand-in-glove: unpeeling the layers to the final truth makes gripping reading.
• Sex! In other lines, it’s emotionally and physically important – in paranormals, it can literally move the world.

Top tip: internal logic
Unlike historicals and contemporaries, you can make up your own rules and create your own world, but beware: within your world, the logic has to be absolute and consistent. We’ll happily accept chickens building airplanes, but they still need fuel to fly.

What to say
• "Is it cheating to sleep with someone from another dimension?"
• "Fantasy and myth are a powerful way to explore subconscious desires."

What not to say
• "Yeah, but that couldn’t really happen, could it? I mean, [insert-supernatural-beings] don’t exist, do they?"

Over to you:
• What’s your favourite ‘paranormal’ fantasy?
• What mythical-magical hero type do you fancy most?

A Bluffer's Guide to ... Contemporaries

With the beautiful new Black Lace covers came three new lines: paranormals, contemporaries, and historicals. Last Wednesday, Olivia Knight offered a bluffer's guide to paranormals, and today Madeline Moore, (that's me!) will do the same for contemporaries. Next Wednesday, historicals will have their moment in the Lust Bites spotlight.




Top facts:
Black Lace line: contemporaries
Colour: various
Committed Lusties, past and present: Madeline Moore, Lauren Dane, Megan Hart, Portia Da Costa, Madelynne Ellis, Dayle A. Dermatis, Teresa Noelle Roberts, Mathilde Madden, Kristina Lloyd, Alison Tyler, Nikki Magennis

In a nutshell:
"Contemporary" means in the here and now. No magic, no fantasy worlds, no Gothic or historical settings, no Oracles no minotaurs no highwaymen no giant scorpions no werewolves no...you get the idea. But! The novels can now take place in any part of the world, not just the UK, as in days gone by. The good news about writing a contemporary novel is, you don't have to create an entire fantasy world from scratch, or conduct anywhere near the kind of research necessary to writing a period piece. The bad news? You're still required to turn in the same word count so if you run out of plot - no extra battle scenes or lessons on the decorum of the times. Whatcha gonna write?




Behind the scenes:
The decree "It has to have a human head" is a no-brainer for this line. Realism is key, except whereas in real life you might lock eyes with a cutie in the elevator and daydream about him later, in the lives of our contemporary erotica heroes and heroines, a lingering gaze in the elevator leads to quick and dirty sex. But the sex has to matter to the plot, so the guy in the elevator would likely turn out to be a) Her new boss! b) The mysterious stranger who's been tailing her. c) Her lover, with whom she likes to play "stranger in the elevator", etc.




The heroes:
Black Lace is looking for more romance these days, primarily of the heterosexual variety, so yes, you need at least one hero, mixed in with the other men our heroine might sample. This doesn't necessarily dictate that he must be a tall, dark, handsome stranger, but he should probably be a decent bloke underneath it all. Since fate has not decreed that he will end up with our heroine this leaves the writer of contemporaries more wiggle room, but since it's a romance...somehow the ending should be HFN (Happy For Now) if not HEA (Happy Ever After.) Rule to remember: He must be horny; he must not be horn-ed.

The heroines:
She's a modern gal, 100% human, so she likely has some faults as well as a healthy libido. Often she's a looker, but not always, and she's usually under the age of forty. If she's fairly untouched at the beginning there must be a reason why. That one can be a brain twister. If she hasn't just left the convent or a bad marriage, and she's an adult, what's she been doing, sex-wise, all these years? Alternately she could be experienced at sex but jaded by the game. Somehow, whether she knows it or not, she's looking for love. Won't say: "No." Will say: "Yes!"




The best bit about writing contemporaries
• Right now, Black Lace wants erotic contemporary romance novels written by women. So if you're a woman who writes contemporaries you're in luck.
• You really can write what you know. Love fashion? Describe the clothes! Fine dining turn your crank? Use it to turn your reader's crank, too. Harbor a secret yearning to be a card shark, concert pianist or athlete? You may never get there, but she can. Love giving head but scared of anal? She's just like you!
• Fucking is reclassified as research: If what you're writing isn't turning you on, how's it gonna turn on the reader? Your sig oth will love it.
• All the world is your stage, baby. Your friends might not enjoy seeing their sexual peccadilloes published (though mine love it) but hey, it's not like they didn't know you were a writer when they spilled the beans.




The best bit about reading contemporaries
• Possibility! The story takes place on planet earth, in the present day. If it happened to her, it's at least possible it could happen to you.
• Chops! These days, Black Lace is looking for literary erotic romance. When you pick up a BL contemporary novel, you can be sure it's well-written, with a plausible plot and interesting characters. In fact, with the new covers, you could read these books in public without shame. Who knows? Your reading material could spark the initial conversation that just might lead to...
• Sex! Yeah! Lots of it, and not the "rocket into space" or "train hurtling into the tunnel" kind, either. Whether it's kinky, romantic, experimental, vengeful, wild or even wrong, there's gonna be lots of it, it's gonna be well done, and it's gonna be hot.

Top tip: internal logic
Of utmost importance when writing a contemporary novel is the very same rule Olivia Knight offered last week, only doubly so. Within your story, the logic has to be absolute and consistent. In regards to contemporaries I add this: the logic must also be believable. So - yes the plane needs fuel to fly, but no, in a contemporary, the pilot may not be a chicken.




What to say
• "Is this so well written it'll blow the socks off Adam Nevill?"
• "How does this make her feel? What does she think about this?" and, "How can I describe it without starting the sentence with 'She felt...' or 'She thought...'"

What not to say
• "It happened to my friend." Doesn't matter. If it doesn't ring true, the fact that it is true means nothing.
• "My goal in life is to be published and if I have to write about yucky sex to accomplish that goal, then dammit I will!"

Over to you:
• What’s your favourite "contemporary" fantasy?
• Who would you like to see used as the basis for the hero in a contemporary erotic romance?


A note about the covers: I haven't included all the new covers in the body of the post, or even all the new Portia da Costa covers(!), due to space constraints. I chose to use at least one of the new covers of our members, past and present, and all the gala Black Lace 15th anniversary covers I could get my hands on.

I'd like to thank Madelynne Ellis for her technical assistance in the creation of the post. Without her, you wouldn't have this final image to consider as you formulate your comments:

Coming attractions

by Olivia Knight

Last week's wet men notwithstanding, this may be the most beautiful image ever to grace the Lust Bites blog (and we don't hold back with our gratuitous photos). Speaking of backs and holding - mmm...

(Perhaps I'm biased. This is almost exactly how I imagine Sir Thomas from "The Three Riddles" in Enchanted, though not featured in his armour here. Or perhaps any woman in her right mind and half the world's men would look at that back and whimper with longing.)

On Monday, Erastes continues the Bluffer's Guide series with her Guide to Gay Historicals. (See image, right.)

On Wednesday, Kate Pearce looks at finishing books - those final details, the letting go, and what to do when you've finished and are sitting folornly staring at the walls. (For ideas, see image, right.)

On Friday, Portia da Costa gets In Too Deep (as in image, right) with her latest UK release.

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Competition winners

Miss Trixie, for your explanation of why wet men are so hot, you win your choice of Enchanted, Southern Spirits, or Phantasmagoria - send your snail mail details and your choice to knight [dot] olivia [at] gmail [dot] com.

CC you win a copy of Wildwood - send your snail mail details to janineashbless [at] fsmail [dot] net

Everyone else, you can award yourself prizes for your own brilliance! Just click on the cover of your choice.

A Bluffer's Guide to... Gay Historicals

Along the lines of the other Bluffer's Guides I thought I'd do a Gay Historical 1-0-1 today.

Top facts:

* Sadly not yet published by Black Lace. I live in hope as they do have m/m/f plotlines.
* Covers. Usually pretty naff.(with the exception of those below)
* Committed Lusties, Erastes, Madelynne Ellis - hell, just about all of us!

In a nutshell

* There's not enough of it, for a start.
* Some Gay Historicals address the very real problems of being gay in a time when it wasn't just unacceptable, it was reviled and illegal. (Basically after Christianity kicked in) However, there were times when man on man love wasn't just acceptable, it was a normal part of everyday life. (The Greeks had a word for it.)
* Thankfully, due to pronouns they are not called things like "The Mediterranean Tycoon's Depraved Heiress" (With thanks to the Random Romance Title Generator)

The heroes

Not too different from the heroes in other historical romances. They are generally aristocratic (tall and handsome goes without saying - plus they are ALWAYS - always hung like horses, this is the law.) So, create your character: Rich, check. Commanding, check. Handsome, check. Cock of unusual size. Check and double check. OK, you can stop checking now.

The, er, OTHER heroes

Now here you can play around a little. You can either make your other hero a match for your arrogant alpha in every sense of the word (and sit back and watch those sparks fly and those buttons go flying (gotta have flying buttons, more later) OR you can create a sensitive little soul. A downtrodden artist, perhaps, or an impoverished tutor. A kidnapped sex slave or an abused and rescued young man. As long as you get a vast gulf between your alpha and your omega, it doesn't really matter. Any excuse to make that boy cry his little heart out because the rough tough alpha doesn't know how to handle him. Or rather - he doesn't know how to handle his feelings - he knows how to handle him all right. (hur hur) The important thing is the desecration of innocence - but don't worry. No matter how nasty the alpha is, your sensitive soul will fall in love with him as he tops from the bottom.

The best bit about writing gay historicals
* Buttons. Oh GOD the buttons. I've coined the term breeches ripper before, but for me waistcoat ripping is far more exciting. Also cravats. You can have a LOT of fun with cravats.
* UST. (No, no, not there, Unresolved Sexual Tension. Buckets and buckets of it. "I'm homosexual!++ Argh! God he's pretty. I wonder if he's homosexual too? How can I let him know? What if he's not? All right... so he is - he's sleeping with Lord [Whossit] - how can I get him?"A writer of gay historicals have immense fun torturing her characters - making every glance count, and when one's passing the port (to the left, of course) at dinner, fingertips are just bound to brush against each other.
* It's much easier to get men together on a day-to-day basis. Whereas a hetero historical writer will have to write about dances, and chaperones and perhaps elopements men can simply hang out with each other, ride in each other's carriages (and no, that's not a euphemism!) without anyone fainting or ruining anyone's reputation. Of course it's pretty difficult to get them into sexual situation, but that's another post...

The best bit about reading gay historicals

* Buttons! Ok, Is it just me and the button porn?
* Appreciating that the author knows exactly what the difference is between a sailor's whipping and a double fisherman but that you don't need to know anything as silly as long as the hero gets tied up.
* Sponge baths.
* Cocks! (sorry, but it did have to be said.) Lots of 'em. Members, yards, rods, poles, perches, arbor vitae, gaying instrument. (yes, really.)

Top tip: beige...biscuit...blasé bleeding anachronisms

Check check check. You may think that it's all right to say your hero's breeches are beige but it wasn't so and any eagle eyed reader will Mock You. They will, however realise if you are trying and make a small slip-up, but they won't appreciate sloppy (or no) research, modern day speech patterns and contemporary men in fancy dress.

What not to say

* “Where's the lube?”
* He climaxed, spunk spurting over his fingers.
* "He's got such a cute ass."

What to say

* “Spit, and have done, man.” (other lubricants are available...)
* GOOD LORD, SHAG HIM ALREADY!
* I'm learning something! Oooo... cocks....

Over to you...

* What gay historicals would you like to see?
* What cliches are you sick of?
* Do you want better covers?
* Anything else?

And if you are interested in finding out more: (and in a more sensible fashion)

Speak Its Name has The Definitive List of Gay Historical fiction.
The Macaronis: Fiction out of the Closet


++homosexual is also anachronistic until the early 20th century, too.

Alpha females

by Olivia Knight

My favourite heroines – to write, to read, to watch – are alpha. In A bluffer's guide to… Paranormals, I said this of the heroines, “Alpha-females to a woman: there’s no time for simpering flowers when you’re locked in a battle against forces what man was not meant to wot of. These chicks are tough: they’ll gut ex-lovers, eat snakes to survive, lead armies, face down the devil, catch werewolves, exorcise demons, endure bitter physical hardship, and wield insane amounts of power. They’re queens, time-travellers, priestesses, sorceresses, reincarnated witches, and goddesses.” But before humbly kowtowing to their acknowledged superiority, let’s be clear what alpha females are – and what they are not.

These are NOT the heroines who prove “women are strong too” – been there, done that, inherited my grandmother’s t-shirt on the subject. These are not heroines who have to be a tougher cookie than the men to survive in a gritty dog-eat-dog man’s world (the New York Bronx accent is creeping up on me already) but get them home and they’re not only tough but warm-hearted, loving and sincere; voted most likely to be a waitress and single mum in a touching comedic drama. Above all, it is not heroines who achieve the ends of success with womanly wiles / tact / delicate social manipulation / et cetera / ad infinitum – the oh-wow-the-company-has-more-profits-with-this-compassionate-firm-but-fair-woman-at-the-helm notion. Probably nothing wrong with that, but it’s not alpha. The alpha female isn’t a feminist recuperation of strength or even palatable to most feminists. I am not singing Sisters are doing it for themselves or Independent Woman (although, if you want to know what Independent Woman would sound like if sung by kittens from the north of England, click here).

Alpha rules. Automatically, intrinsically, very often literally, albeit sometimes at the end of a sword.

‘Feels good, doesn’t it?’ he murmured. His cock was stirring against her. The room was silent, the onlookers tense and bewildered. She strove to think of something which would give her strength, some concrete talisman against the spell which held her. Thomas was a blur – the castle, a shell – the country, just land – then her mind landed on the mandala. The two teardrops interlocked; in the gold, a drop of silver, and in the blue, a drop of green. His hands roamed her back and rump, guiding her to nest his erection between her thighs. Lust swelled. She fixed the mandala in her vision as her hand ran up his chest, down his arm, and onto her sword-hilt. As she stepped back and swirled around, she drew the sword in one fluid movement and completed the circle with its blade raised and level, running smoothly across his neck. He staggered back, clutching the wound, his eyes agape. He tried to speak, but blood hissed and bubbled at his throat. The choker strangled her like a noose. She could neither breathe nor utter a word, but she stepped back neatly as Thomas had taught her and ran the duke through. His wild eyes stared down at the new wound. When she pulled the sword out, he fell, and she stamped hard on his heart. Blood sprayed through both cuts; his eyes rolled up. As his head fell back, the choker fell open and tumbled off, its curse broken. Her sword tip on the ground, her dress splashed with Kardan’s blood, she looked up at her counsellors.
‘Remember this,’ she said. ‘This is how I deal with traitors.’

– The Three Riddles in Enchanted

Alpha heroines are Not Nice – they’re not the ones you want to be your best friends, they’re the ones you want to be. The ones who leave you ten foot tall, walking as if you’re doing the ground a favour, swanning through grateful air, eyes burning as you plan your world-domination. These women are powerful:

Abruptly, she was above the surface again, imbuing her body with the furnace-heat of that furious, determined spark. As her arms rose, the gargantuan power flowed upwards into them, a borrowed force that could tear down heaven and hell by simply outlasting them, that had existed long before them and would continue after.
She saw the Devil again, with her own eyes and with the Mother’s, no longer as the most powerful and ancient of evils to confront humanity but as an upstart. … Her mouth opened in a roar, and the words that rolled like lava from her tongue, the Mother’s words and her own, were ‘Leave my child alone!’
The sound rolled outwards from her, in concentric waves across the meadows, out onto the river, up the avenue, rebounding off the tall college walls and crashing back across them. Her body shone with radiance, her human eyes could hardly withstand the brilliance of Adrian. He stood upright, beyond the Devil, no longer needing support as the silver core of him coalesced into a whole once more and his luminous eyes met hers. A net of light spun itself between them, a spider’s web, a canopy, of pure silver. Spears of power passed between them, from eyes to eyes, forehead to forehead, breast to breast, groin to groin, each a lance through the crumbling edifice of evil between them. As the old man’s shape drifted into dust, the flaming giants rose up from them at last, again, reached out, and held each other close.

– The Ten Visions

These heroines fight back – with scorcery and swords, with arson and armies. If there’s a village under attack, they don’t get rescued, they gallop in with sword whirring. If there’s a country, they rule it. If there’s a battle, they lead it. If there’s an enemy, they fight it. With the power, you see, comes the responsibility:

‘Can you even begin to understand what you’ve done?’ His voice resonated, shaking the tree she hung onto. ‘We are the guardians of fate. But you thought you knew better – you! Who can’t see the consequences of even one of your actions!’ His scorn slashed through her. ‘Thanks to you, the whole fabric of fate is creaking with strain. The further it goes off course, the harder to realign it. It was so simple – one tiny act – and for that, a man’s heart broke, another man died. And still, you wouldn’t listen to us! Now whole towns are laid to waste, whole countries teeter.’

– The Three Riddles in Enchanted

‘Let them die,’ she screamed. He was close enough to see her face glistening with tears, contorted. ‘They deserve it!’
‘Nina!’ he bellowed.
She spun around to face him, blazing. Her eyes were wild and thick with tears. ‘My children are killing my children!’

– The Dragon Lord in Magic and Desire

Alpha females don’t get an easy time, as heroines: they must be strong as iron, endure without complaint, and never even whimper. I thought I put Nina through her paces, in The Dragon Lord – she suffers such unbearable pain that she habitually throws herself onto a stone floor to knock herself out, she hikes naked through rough terrain for days, hallucinating, she scrapes off her own skin with a rock – and then I wrote The Three Riddles, and learnt how to really punish a heroine. Having lost one lover and gutted the other, Pearl gallops off on her trials: alone on horseback in midwinter, eating snakes and field mice to survive, finding the burnt corpses of her subjects piled in heaps, tormented by a vulgar little being, fording freezing rivers, dragged across frozen ground by her horse, tapping its veins for nourishment, swimming an icy lake, and when she’s bleeding, malnourished, hypothermic, emotionally drained, and weak as a kitten, she gets attacked by a wolf. And that's why she's Queen: because giving up is not an option.

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Featured alpha heroines from left to right: • The Bride in Kill Bill, played by Uma Thurman • Pearl in The Three Riddles in Enchanted • Queen Elizabeth I, here played by Cate Blanchett • Nina in The Dragon Lord in Magic and Desire • Angelina Jolie, here as Mrs Smith in Mr and Mrs Smith • Sarah in The Ten Visions • Officer Aeryn Sun in Farscape, played by Claudia Black

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So who are your favourite alpha females? What do you most love about them? And how do they make you feel?