It's 5 O'Clock Somewhere . . .

Hello, lovely and lusty ones! I’m delighted you could join us to kick off December with some holiday decadence. What could be more decadent than sharing cocktails with a bunch of smutwriters at five o’clock in the morning, or five o’clock wherever you are? Along with cocktails, we’ll be serving appetizers: juicy secrets about the Lustbites authors (hopefully the latter will increase as the booze begins to flow). You might even find a few cocktail recipes tucked in among the gossip. I’m Anne, your hostess, bartender, and designated driver. Anyone who needs a ride home across The Pond will need to check with the nearest dark, mysterious stranger reading alone at the back of the bar (Shanna, isn’t your vice men reading alone in bars?).

So grab a seat, order a drink, slip off your shoes -- or your inibitions, or your panties, or whatever else you might do to make yourself comfortable -- and let’s get to know each other. Whether you’re a writer or a reader or both, please share a bit about yourself, too, using our questions or some of your own. Your favorite cocktail recipes are welcome, too; your bartender could use some inspiration here.

I’d like to say thanks to Alison Tyler for passing the swizzle stick to me for this shindig – hopefully she’ll drop in to procrastinate with us for awhile and have a few drinks.

Okay, I’ll spin the empty champagne bottle. (One down already? It's going to be a wild Monday.)

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

DEANNA ASHFORD

Hi, I'm Deanna Ashford and I live in the south of England, close toLondon. I'm a full time writer when I'm not looking after everyone else in my family, including my very elderly King Charles Spaniel. I write historical, fantasy and modern erotica. My favourite are historicals and I'd write them all the time if my editor would let me!I love the research and find the past infinitely more interesting than the present.

Favourite Authors: Lots but the ones I can think of are Simon Scarrow,Bernard Cornwell and Mark Adkin.

Religion: None but Buddism does sound interesting

Turned on by: Passionate, fairly muscular men, with dark curls youwant to run your fingers through and blue/green eyes.

Would like to fuck: A certain guy who shall remain nameless but you can find his description above.

Passions other than sex: Writing of course, romantic music, historyand travel.

Major character flaw: I'm typical of my birth-sign Aries and I worry way too much about what I look like.

Drink of Choice: Mai-Tai
1 ounce Fine Jamaican Rum
1 ounce Martinique Rum (St. James)
1/2 ounce Orange Curacao
1/2 ounce Orgeat Syrup
Juice from one fresh lime (about 3/4 ounce)

Shake vigorously and serve. I chose this because it reminds me of Hawaii my most favourite place.

OLIVIA KNIGHT

Hi, I'm Olivia. I drink red wine, smoke roll-ups, listen to film scores on full blast, stay up late, walk very fast, and talk too much at parties. I'm the one standing outside with a cigarette who's just thrown her wine all over her dress. And that's why I wear black. No, I'm not drunk - I'm by nature a loud, friendly, clumsy person. And here's the Q&A lowdown...

Favorite to read: A.S. Byatt

Favorite to watch (apart from a man undressing): Farscape

Favorite food & drink: daytime, oatcakes & coffee; nightime, cheese & wine

Religion: anything featuring priestesses & ancient vaulting stone - I'm a temple-whore

Things that make me hot: words - words words words - intelligence - hipbones - strong arms - thick black hair - skin-smell

Would like to fuck: Legolas, Aragorn, Tristan

Passions other than writing and sex: candles, art, music, walking, and trees

Major character flaw: stubborn as a rock. In fact, rocks have nothing on me.

Favorite quotation: "Do I look absolutely divine and regal, yet at the same time very pretty and rather accessible?" - Queenie, from Blackadder

Philosophy: Do what you love.

Olivia's Martini Tutorial:

• Dash of vermouth

  Gin

  An olive, speared on a toothpick

Use an ice-cold glass. Roll the vermouth around a martini glass, tossing out any extra. Put the olive in on its toothpick. Fill a cocktail shaker with ice & shake two measures of gin in it, then strain it into the glass.

Note the absence of crushed ice, mixers, cherries, vodka, and nasty stuff that comes in a bottle labelled "Martini" but which isn't. It's really not so hard - so I can't work out why almost nowhere can get it right...

"Martini, martini, the drink I like most -

Two and I'm under the table,

Three and I'm under host."

- Dorothy Parker

ANNE TOURNEY

I’ve been writing erotic fiction since the early 1990’s. Most recently I’ve been writing erotica and erotic romance novels for Black Lace and Cheek. I’ve also published a bit of dark fantasy and mainstream fiction here and there. Today my latest Cheek novel Lying in Mid-Air makes its debut in the U.S. And I just typed “The End” on my 2008 Cheek release, Kiss Between My Lines.

Favorite Author: So, so hard to choose just one, but I think my all-time favorite, in terms of both the depth and breadth of her creativity and the influence she had on my writing, is Margaret Atwood.

Religion: Episcopagnostic

Things that make me hot: Intelligence, wit, creativity, and passion in anyone, male or female. Deep, long kisses that make you feel like you’re blissfully drowning. Men with strong, large, well-shaped hands. Men who tell me stories or read me poetry. Horse toys (I’ll tell you more about that after we’ve had a few).

Would like to fuck: Alexander the Great. Yeah, I know, time travel’s a bitch, but I’ll go to great lengths for a truly dominant male.

Passions other than writing or sex: Reading, photography, movies, long walks alone, contemporary poetry, my sweet six-toed Siamese cat, sushi, sweets, music (classical, jazz, alternative rock, and ambient are some of my favorites).

Drink: Cranberry juice with 7-Up and a lemon twist.

Philosophy of life: It’s not a party till somebody spills their drink.

Major character flaw: A love of excess. And more excess. And a bit more of that excess, please.

Favorite sex toy: Anything that makes me feel like I have four legs and a tail.

Secret for overcoming writer’s block: A sledgehammer.

Cocktail recipe: This is the only time of year that I can justify drinking fattening drinks. The rest of the year, I could knock 'em back anyway, but with considerably more guilt.

Peppermint Stick

1 1/2 oz. Creme de Cacao
1 oz. Peppermint Schnaps
1 oz. light cream

Shake ingredients with ice; strain into a champagne flute. Garnish with a candy cane.

And I had to add this one, just ‘cause I love anything slippery:

Slippery Nog

3/4 oz. Bailey’s Irish Cream
3/4 oz. Butterscotch Schnapps
Eggnog

Combine Bailey’s and schnapps in a highball glass, fill with eggnog. Stir well. Suck it down. Mmmmm . . . .

Holiday cocktail recipes from Drink Nation.


KATE PEARCE

Hi, I’m Kate Pearce, and you’re probably going to ask me if I write children’s books but I don’t -- really, I don’t. Despite looking like your average frumpy housewife, I write the edgy erotic romance novels that my mother is ashamed of. I’m originally from the UK and now live in California so I understand both sides of all the Lustie’s arguments which can get quite confusing sometimes. (erm not that we ever argue of course)

I write for Virgin Cheek, Ellora’s Cave and Kensington Aphrodisia so I’m busy as hell but glad to be employed. Historicals are my favorite books to write but somehow the contemporaries and futuristics sell just as well.

Favorite author: Just one? Jane Austen

Religion: Ex Roman Catholic and okay with that.

Things that make me hot: Voices, smiles, muscled arms, my hubby, Becks and Take That.

Would like to fuck: Now this minute?

Passions other than writing and sex? Riding a horse, reading, my little dog, good food and friends.

Major character flaw: I don’t have one -- erm, complacency

Philosophy: Life’s too short to waste doing something you hate.

Drink:

Strawberry Lemondrop Martini

3 oz vodka
4 oz sweet and sour mix
6 drops lemon juice
1 tsp sugar

Pour all ingredients into a cocktail shaker, and shake. Place the rim of a chilled cocktail/martini glass in a bowl of lemon juice, then transfer to a bowl of sugar in order to coat the rim. Pour the contents of the cocktail shaker into the cocktail glass, and serve. Makes 2 martinis.

TERESA NOELLE ROBERTS

Hi, Teresa Noelle Roberts here. You can call me T. Want some coffee, or maybe a glass of wine? Pull up a chair--you'll probably have to move a cat or two first--and make yourself comfortable. I'm writing from southern Massachusetts, unfortunately not right on the beautiful wintry coast, but I can pretend. I write short fiction, novels, and poetry, mostly erotic and/or mystical in nature. I also write erotic fiction as half of the fabulous two-headed monster named Sophie Mouette. I've been playing with words since before I actually knew how to write, and will probably continue to do so until they pry the keyboard out of my cold dead hands.

Favorite author: In what genre? I think I have a word limit here... I have an old-fashioned love for Jane Austen, because of the way she handles serious matters with a light touch.

Religion: Crunchy freeform pagan.

Things that make me hot: Beautiful eyes, intelligence, thinking dominance, leather, little beards, wit, cleavage (most likely not in combination with a little beard, but gender-bending is pretty hot too). And did I mention wit, intelligence, and dominance?

Would like to fuck: Possibly, if you're witty, smart, and on the toppy side, but my dance card's full these days.

Passions other than writing and sex? Food and cooking. The ocean. Belly dance. Sharing any of the above (and writing and where appropriate, sex) with those I love.

Drink: Champagne or rich red wine. Possibly a fine Scotch.

Major character flaw: Procrastination. (I should be working on a novel right now!)

Philosophy: I like being on the bisexual fence. I can see my house from here. More to the point, I can see yours . . . and the view in your bedroom window's mighty nice!


DAYLE DERMATIS

An interviewer once said of me that I have so many pseudonyms, you'd think I was a spy! Under my own name (Dayle A. Dermatis), she writes fantasy/SF. As Sophie Mouette, with coauthor Teresa Noelle Roberts, I write erotica and erotic romance. As Sarah Dale, with coauthor Sarah J. Husch, I write erotic romance. And as Andrea Dale, I write erotica and erotic romance, too... Apparently I've never seen the point in using pen names for privacy reasons.

I work full time as a writer and editor, and live in southern California within scent of the ocean. No, the recent wildfires didn't threaten me, although the sky turned the color of what I imagine the sky in hell looks like (if I believed in hell). I have impressive cleavage. Many people are surprised to learn I'm not a Virgo.

Favourite author: Guy Gavriel Kay

Politics: No, thank you

Religion: Pagan Turned on by: Full lower lips, dark blue eyes, naughty wickedness, sense of humor

Would like to fuck: Many of you

Passions other than sex: Styx, history, costuming, textile/fiber arts, music, herbalism, Wales, Celtic studies, birds of prey, cats (big and small), faeries, Pre-Raphaelites, Craftsman bunglows, travel (37 countries to date), motorcycling . . .

Major character flaw: Not admitting I have one

Favourite anecdote: The first thing William the Conqueror did when landing in Britain was trip and fall on his face. He recovered by grasping a handful of sand and announcing that it was the first part of Britain he'd conquered. No idea if it's true, but damn, I wish I had that ability to think on my feet! (Or not, as the case may be...)

Drink: Although I once wrote a story about a drink called The Witch of Venice, I prefer a nice, crisp, dry white wine. Or champagne. "It doesn't matter whether the glass is half-empty or half-full. What matters is whether there's another bottle of champagne chilling in the fridge."


SHANNA GERMAIN

Hi all - Shanna Germain hailing from Portland, Ore. where it's currently raining. Where it's always raining. Which means I get to spend a lot of time cooped up in my home office, with the cat on my lap and a soy mocha on my desk, pumping out words. I write a little bit of everything -- I'm mainly a short story writer, but I also write poetry, articles, novellas and, most recently, novels. My topics are almost always sex and death. Blame it on my hippie parents. Or my sordid past as a college student. Or the years that I worked as a paramedic. Or maybe those are just the things that interest me most. (Can I say that on Blogger?)

Favorite author: Amy Bloom.

Politics: Way too liberal to still be living in the U.S.

Religion: Naturalistic pantheist. Or heathen. Depends on the day.

Things that give me a hard-on: A good laugh, great dimples (in either set of cheeks), blue-blue eyes, snake hips, muscled calves, curly hair, boots, a woman who walks like she means it, a man reading alone in a bar.

Would like to fuck: Yes.

Passions other than sex: Writing, first and foremost. Then, sex. Oh, wait, other than sex . . . walking and hiking, playing sports, coffee, dark beer, good food, travel, great friends.

Major character flaw: Fear disguised as humor

Favourite anecdote: Dorothy Parker was once interrupted on her honeymoon by Harold Ross (her indomitable editor at The New Yorker), pressing her for a belated book review. "Too fucking busy," Parker replied, "and vice versa."

Drink: I'll have two of everything.


JANINE ASHBLESS

Hi – I’m Janine Ashbless. I live in England, and write full time. I foster dogs for a rescue charity. I’ve got chainsaw certification. I’ve been trained in shamanic journeying, though I don’t do it any more. I write paranormal, fairy-tale and fantasy erotica : "Vivid and tempestuous and dangerous, and bursting with sacrifice, death and love. " Portia says – I couldn’t ask for a better description. Imagine a bastard cross between Angela Carter and Robert E. Howard! I also write ‘straight’ ghost stories and horror – but not under this name. I write because it’s a physical addiction: if I stop for too long I start to go wappy.

Favourite author: HP Lovecraft (not as rude as he sounds!).
Politics: Green

Religion: Pagan atheist

Turned on by: Intellect, goatee beards, long hair, heroism

Would like to fuck: Gerard Butler

Passions other than sex: Travel, myth, greyhound welfare

Major character flaw: Embittered idealist

Favourite anecdote:

Niels Bohr, the quantum physicist, was asked why he had a horseshoe nailed over his door.
"For luck."
"But you don’t believe in that sort of thing, surely!"
"No I don’t. But I understand it works whether you believe it or not."

Drink: Mine’s a Bloody Mary, Anne!

Bloody Mary

4 -6 cubes (cracked) Ice
1dash Worcestershire sauce
1 dash tabasco sauce
1 measure vodka
6 measures tomato juice
1/2 a lemon worth lemon juice
1 pinch celery salt
1 pinch cayenne pepper

Put the cracked ice into a shaker. Dash the Worcestershire sauce and Tobasco sauce over the ice and pour in the vodka, tomatoe juice and lemon juice. Shake vigorously until a frost forms. Strain into a tall, chilled glass, add a pinch of celery salt and a pinch of cayenne pepper. Decorate with celery stick and/ or slice of lemon.

KRISTINA LLOYD

Hello. I’m Kristina Lloyd and you’ll always find me in the kitchen at parties. I live in Brighton on the south coast of England, and I write about women who like it on the dark, dirty and dangerous side. That’ll be me then. I’m quiet and bookish (shut up Madden, I am) and I like a nice whisky. My third Black Lace book, Split, has just been released and I seem to spend a lot of time staring into the middle distance, wondering when he’ll untie me.

Good stuff: bees, i-Pod, men swimming, me swimming, taxidermy, shingle beaches, porn, Pilot Hi-techpoint V5 pens (black ink), cartography, straitjackets, Andalusia, olives, marionettes, opium poppies and lots of other lovely, idiosyncratic nonsense like that.

Cocktail of choice: Margarita

1. For that salt-frosted rim, chill glass in freezer. Rub a lime wedge around rim. Dip in a saucer of salt. (Well, I think that’s how I did it last time. Tequila affects my memory.)

2. Follow the 3:2:1 rule. Three parts tequila, 2 parts Triple Sec, 1 part freshly squeezed lime juice. Shake in an old jam jar for that extra homemade touch. Pour over a smidgen of crushed ice. Add lime wedge.

Chin-chin!

MADELYNNE ELLIS

Hi, I'm Madelynne Ellis, Full Time Writer, Evil Goth Sorceress, Stoker of the Stove of Screaming Souls, Tender of the Bone Orchard, the Opaline Incantatrix, Fantoccini Chef, Haunter of the Dark Supermarket, Freelance Crypto-zoologist, Word-Bitch In Resident at Hobbs End Lunatic Asylum, ship's mum and harlot.

Favorite author: JRR Tolkien

Passions other than writing and sex? Theatrical make-up, dressing up in silly costumes, scaring people.

Favourite drink: Port, Goblin Cider, Cognac. Not necessarily in that order.

Major character flaw: Stubborn.

Favorite quotation: "If music be the food of love . . . Prepare for indigestion." -
Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick & Tich.

Favorite colour: Triad black

Favourite vicarious pastime: Flirting

Would like to play seduction games with: Gackt, Jonathan Rhys Meyers & Lord Wraxall. And yes, together would be fine.

Secret for overcoming writer's block: A four hour bubble bath.

MADELINE MOORE

Favorite author: I’m a voracious reader. Always have been. There are a slew of authors I faithfully read as their new books come out. Alice Munro, though she’s said she might stop writing now because her grandma once said to her, ‘Why make more misery?’ She dedicated one of her books like so: ‘To the careful reader.’ I like that very much. I recently discovered Sarah Dunant’s In the Company of the Courtesan and have been devouring her books as quickly as I can find them. In the erotica department I think I’ve read something by every member of Lustbites, at least a short story. The work is as varied as the individuals who make up our blog, but I’ve honestly enjoyed all of it.

I’ll miss Susie Bright’s Best of American Erotica anthologies, especially since I haven’t been in one. I love Alison Tyler’s “ABC” series, Cleis Press, and I will be in L is for Leather.

Favorite movie: When Apocalypse Now ended I fell to my knees in the theatre. That movie knocked me out! I enjoyed the recent expanded version. Fight Club, Adaptation, Notes On A Scandal, Elizabeth. The list is huge. I write TV and film scripts so I watch a lot of movies and a fair bit of TV and sometimes, I admit, I can get pretty excited about a nice long TV night featuring Bones, CSI Vegas, Law and Order CI, Weeds, The L Word . . .

Favorite food: A true prairie girl like me can’t get by without red meat, though I’ve tried from time to time. I like a great steak, crazy about my own beef stew, and lately, the mere mention of a Kelsey’s burger with cracked peppercorns and basil mayo makes my mouth water. I like gravy, a lot. But for a real dining out experience, oh give me Thai food! Glass noodles, papaya salad, chicken curry with coconut milk, salad rolls, and for dessert, fried bananas with coconut ice cream. Cob coon mac mac, ca!

Religion: Deist. There’s something out there, just don’t ask me what it is and do not attempt to tell me what it is, either.

Things that make me hot: Anticipation (for a few hours only, not for a few days.) Lingerie. A firm hand and a soft voice. Words, baby, lots of words, crooned in a low, rumbling male baritone. When I’m hot I get wet, and that makes me hotter, which makes me wetter…and so on. I love the way that works.

Would like to fuck: In my dreams, Vincent D’onofrio and Dennis Quaid. In real life I’m happier than I’ve ever been since Felix Baron became my lover.

Passions other than writing and sex? I lived in Thailand for 2 years when I was 14 – 16 years old, and I continue to be interested in all things Thai, especially the food, and thick, straight, black hair.

I enjoy great conversation – and I get lots of that at Lust Bites. I’m passionate about my beautiful daughters and their education.

I guess I’m pretty nuts about my huge chocolate Siamese cat, Leo. He’s incredibly affectionate, talks a lot, and loves getting presents. He knows if I’m sick or sad, and comforts me in his kitty cat way. In fact, I believe that cats are proof that there is a God, as they are such a perfect pet (they even make a pleasant rumbling sound when you stroke them, for gawd’s sake) I find it hard to believe they weren’t crafted by the Master.

Drink: Schweppe’s diet ginger ale.

Major character flaw: Moi? I have been known to lose my temper – suddenly, explosively, very verbally. I have an addictive personality so almost everything I enjoy becomes a problem, sooner or later, (see above, favourite drink, diet ginger ale, sigh.) Some exceptions to that rule are sex, writing and music.

Favorite quotation: ‘A man climbs a mountain and they call him a hero. I climb mountains that aren’t even there!’ Francis Ford Coppola

Philosophy: If you don’t like me, don’t be around me. Also, if I’m not doing it with a glad heart, then I’m not doing it at all.

Favorite sex toy: I can’t tell you my favourite sex toy. All the other sex toys might get jealous.

Secret for overcoming writer’s block: Nothing overcomes writer’s block like a good deadline. If I don’t have one and can’t make myself respect my own, I just get Felix to give me a deadline. That works.

PORTIA DA COSTA

Drink: Stella Artois

• open bottle or can


• pour into glass


• drink


• alternatively may be drunk from bottle or can

Bio: My name's Portia Da Costa [sometimes] and I live in a small town in West Yorkshire with my husband and three cats. I write mainly contemporary erotic romance, with occasional forays into paranormal. I'd love to try writing a hot historical some day, or maybe an urban fantasy, but I probably don't have sufficient plotting skills for either.

Favourite authors: Thomas Harris and Ian Fleming. Cyrian Amberlake for erotica. Currently reading Lord of Scoundrels by Loretta Chase, and just finished Claiming the Courtesan by Anna Campbell - both excellent.

Favourite fantasy heroes of the moment: Robert Goren, Professor Charles Eppes and Special Agent Don Eppes, Eisenheim the Illusionist, Captain Jack Sparrow

Favourite pastime: watching the telly

Favourite foods: fish and chips, chocolate, cake

Favourite drinks: tea, coffee, apple juice, lager

Major character flaw: all of them.

Love, WendyPortia

So that's some of us . . . have a drink (or two, or six) and tell us who you are.